Scott is in occupational therapy, Jordan and Shaina at day camp and I find myself in a rare moment of aloneness; not always a bad thing, but I find myself feeling like I should be doing something that I'm not. Then I realized I had a great opportunity of uninterrupted time to update you on Scott's swallow test yesterday.

I took Scott to Waldo County General Hopsital for a fiber optic and modified barium swallow test with Mike Towey yesterday. Believe it or not, WCGH houses the voice and swallowing center of Maine, not some bigger hospital like EMMC as I would have suspected. One thing that WCGH can do that Eastern Maine doesn't is the fiber optic testing which consists of inserting a camera into the nasal passage and watching everything that happens during a swallow. It was fascinating to watch the muscles inside the throat move as Scott hummed, tried to cough and then swallowed green applesauce. Mike Towey was very good at explaining everything in a way that we could understand and it was this fiber optic test that gave us the answers we had been looking for as to why Scott is still having trouble with swallowing liquids and to some extent loud vocalization.

Scott has a paralyzed vocal fold(chord). The vocal folds are two muscles that move together to close off the airway during a swallow. They also close together to prevent air from coming back up while speaking. Scott's left vocal fold is paralyzed, so when the right one does what it's supposed to, the airway is not completely protected and thus he tends to aspirate on liquids.

Mike has recommended some Ear, Nose and Throat specialists to take a look at Scott and see if he is a candidate for a procedure that would in effect hitch the two vocal folds together, thus allowing them to close together and provide for a more effective swallow and better speech.

On another note, because we were in Belfast yesterday we decided to make a day of it and spend some time at home and at Nana's. It's not the first time we've had Scott down in our area, but it's the first time he actually got to spend time at home, checking out Dad's gardens, sitting on the front lawn chatting, petting Lilly, our dog. When we crested the hill just before the house Scott pointed and said "home, sweet, home." but even better than that he followed it up by saying "Best home in the world." It's something you hope for but never expect to hear especially when most of the day you hear the others complaining about wanting their own room, or not having enough space to put any of their "stuff." It gives me hope that one day, they will all look back and appreciate the love they received growing up and learn to truly appreciate what they had and now have.

It's been a tough week. Jordan has been sick with a stomach bug and therefore I've been trying to split my time between home and Brewer by driving back and forth each day. It makes me yearn for home all the more. I'm not the only one. Scott says every day that he wishes he were home or that he can't wait to go home. I wish life could be a little easier.

I was asked this week if God is such a loving God and is healing Scott anyway, why wouldn't he just prevent the accident in the first place and save all this trouble. Pat was great in answering. He said that we would never know our need for God or truly come to rely on Him if we weren't faced with troubles. When things are going great, we tend to rely on ourselves and pat ourselves on the back for all our accomplishments, but when trouble comes we call out to God and realize our true condition without Him and also realize that anything good that we've been given has been from Him.

While I want more than anything to have everyone home again, I want it in God's timing because He alone knows what the future holds and what will be best for Scott. There are obviously still things that need to happen or hearts that need to be touched or lessons I need to learn and therefore I pray that God would reveal to me whether there is something I am doing or not doing that is preventing us from being able to take Scott home sooner, or if He just wants me to wait and trust and know that He is working in our behalf, even if we can't see what is being done.

God is so awesome and has answered so many prayers and is still answering them and I truly can't wait to see the end product. My one constant prayer is that Scott will come out of this with a heart devoted to his healer, God, and that no one will be able to take that away from him. I want Scott fully restored more than anything. But more than that, I want him living a life for God's glory.

We found out today that, despite information we received before buying the policy, Anthem did place a limit on Scott's in patient rehabilitation. His policy states that he has only 100 days of in patient care in a skilled facility. We found this out on Tuesday, and Wednesday was the 100th day. He will continue at Brewer Rehab, MaineCare will pick up the bill for now. As long as Scott continues to progress, MaineCare places no limitations on his stay in Brewer.

Scott's walking continues to improve. He does a warm up round with a walker, then walks with a crutch and finally with nothing but the aid of the therapist. Belinda's says her goal for next week is for Scott to be able to walk alone with the walker and no assistance. She has also approved us to walk with him alone without the aid of a CNA, so he is walking at least twice a day now, instead of three times a week.

Monday he had lots of chance to practice his walking. We took him to Nana's for a barbecue and he walked from the car, up the road to the front lawn and down the lawn beside the house. At one point he also walked into the house which consisted of a couple of steps. He did great. I know he had a good time and it was so good to have him home in familiar surroundings even if only for one evening.

We've been playing cards regularly including pinochle, cribbage, go fish, and crazy eights. He beat both Shaina and I at cribbage, and his luck in pinochle has not changed since his accident. He always seems to get just the right cards to get the most possible points per hand. Today, Sheldon and Scott played as a team against Shaina and I. Scott and Sheldon beat in just two hands receiving 44 points in the first hand and sixty in the second. For those who don't play pinochle, a game usually consists of several rounds of play until one team reaches 100 points. It's unusual to get more than 30 points in one hand.

Next step is a swallow test Scott will have on Tuesday morning in Belfast. We hope you will all pray with us that this test will finally show that he is able to consume liquids. He is definitely ready for soft foods that don't include puree, but we don't dare to experiment with liquids as the two previous tests showed silent aspiration which could easily lead to pneumonia.

Being able to consume liquids would also allow the removal of the feeding tube that he still has. This is the last tube that remains and we would so love to see it removed. Again, though, as I stated before, when we pray for things for Scott, we always ask that God do things in His timing because we trust that he knows best, and if this isn't the right time, for whatever reason, we trust God because He knows and loves Scott and wants the best for him even more than we do....

I realized I haven't updated the prayer requests lately and wanted to post some requests for you to pray for with us.

Please pray that Scott's balance will continue to improve ~ when he first started walking he was walking with the aid of 4 therapists and an r-jo walker. Now he walks with the aid of only one therapist and either a regular walker or just a crutch. Today we also played catch while standing. He stood in the parallel bars without holding on, while a therapist stood behind him to catch him if he began to falter. He caught the ball with both hands every time I threw it and was able to throw it back to me so that I could catch it.

Please pray that Scott will continue to remain upbeat and not have any serious issues with depression ~ while I know some depression is inevitable, I  pray that Scott will talk about his feelings when the time comes and seek out or find others who have gone through similar circumstances and triumphed so that he will be able to look to the future without living with regrets of the past. Scott apologizes constantly for the car accident, even though I have told him many times that there is no indication that it was his fault. He always says he's glad, but apologizes again anyway.

Please pray that Scott will grow closer to God through this experience instead of allowing it to give him excuse to turn his back on God ~ at this point there is no indication that he is angry at God or himself or anyone else for what he is having to go through, however I know from experience that trials of this nature tend to either draw us to or away from God and I am praying for the first to be true in Scott's life.

Please pray that Scott's swallow will get stronger to the point of being able to eat regular food as well as drink liquids and that the feeding tube will be able to be removed ~ Scott continues to enjoy all the food that is placed before him, with the exception of dinner tonight. He really did not like the roast beef they put on his plate and therefore did not eat it, which is a first so far. It's a good indication that his tastes have returned and now that he's eating on a regular basis, he can afford to be a little picky, knowing that if Mom doesn't think he's gotten enough to eat she'll always bring him a pudding cup or fruit smoothie or some other goody to make up for it. A fiber optic swallow test has been ordered to take place at Waldo County General Hospital sometime in July. We don't have the exact date yet. This should tell whether or not liquids can be introduced orally and if not, what can be done to help.

Please pray for continued improvement with Scott's memory ~ Just a few short weeks ago you could ask Scott a question, give him the answer and then five minutes later he would have already forgotten. Now he remembers things we talked about yesterday or the day before. When asked what he had for breakfast, he is most likely to say no idea. However, when I asked him yesterday, he replied eggs. he couldn't remember the whole meal but he did remember some. I read to him regularly from some pretty tough philosophy books. I usually list them and have Scott choose the one he wants. Today, I said, you know what books are in your room which do you want me to read? He replied Lewis... This was especially impressive because of all the books in his room, we hadn't read any from that one yet so it was the least likely that he should remember.

While therapy is a lot of hard work, it can also be a lot of fun and games. Quite often we bat the balloon back and forth volleyball style and see how long we can keep it in the air between the two of us.

We've also started playing card games with Scott. I hadn't done this before because I wasn't sure of his ability to hold cards in his hand. It started with a game of Skipbo between Scott and Shaina. He chooses the cards with his left hand and places them in his right so as to leave his left hand free to make the necessary plays. His right hand is a little shaky but he can easily hold 5 cards.

Yesterday I discovered that, though it is more difficult, he can hold more cards than that. We played a game of crazy eights and as he had no card in his hand that he could play, he had to pick up several before he was able to.

I had to go home last night and before I left I asked if there were any other games he wanted me to bring back to play with him. His immediate answer was pinochle. This game is quite a bit more difficult than crazy eights and go fish but I promised I would play it with him tonight after dinner.

His balance is better. It is getting much easier to transfer him from chair to bed, and chair to car. He does most of the work himself. He is chewing many of the pureed meats they give him, so I feel he will be ready for something other than puree in the very near future. I'm not sure when liquids will come. He will be going for a fiber optic swallow study in Belfast in mid July. This will allow them to see not only where the food is going but what is happening in the mouth during a swallow. It should help them pinpoint the problem Scott is having with liquids and seek to find a way to make it possible for him to have them.

In my opinion, Scott probably gets the most fun therapy on weekends. Regina, as a rec therapist has been painting with him, "climbing" with him, "fishing" with him, etc. While they can't actually go fishing and climbing, she brings in the gear he would need for each activity and helps him to use it. II believe it really makes a difference in his morale, knowing that one day soon he will again be doing all the things he loves to do. Plus the fact, that through these activities he knows that we believe he will be doing them all again.

Yesterday I was testing Scott's mental math memory. I asked him the square root of 9, 25 and 144. He answered immediately and correctly with each question. I then asked him what the square of Sheldon is. He pointed to himself and answered "Me, I'm two of him."

Today Shaina was practicing reciting the books of the Bible so she can get extra points at Bible school. She came to a place where she couldn't remember what came next, Scott was very quick to help her out and was correct. I then asked him how many of the Bible books he could recite and he answered all 66. He also recited John 3:16 for me. I was very impressed and very glad that God's word is still with him. I'm sure that it was with him and a comfort to him when he was still in a coma at EMMC.

When I'm at home my heart is in Brewer and when I'm in Brewer my heart is at home. I love being with and caring for my family, but right now they are in two different places. We were away over the weekend and it was so great to spend time together outside of Maine even if the majority of it was spent in a moving vehicle. We visited with family and reunited with Sheldon to bring him home after a long few months away.

Coming back was truly a blessing, because Scott had changed so much just over the weekend. His speaking is clearer, though not all of it. His walking is stronger and the smile on his face when he sees you coming can melt your heart. It almost makes me want to leave and come back more often.

He also has an incredible way with words, always making you feel like you are exactly the one person he was hoping to see today. Yesterday as I sat talking with him he said "Thank you." I said what for. He replied "Thanks for being beautiful."

Yesterday as he walked with his walker and the aid of his therapists, I noticed his balance was much improved. I also noticed that Belinda wasn't having to cue him with every step to shift his weight or regain his balance. In fact he walked the whole length of the path outside, three times with only two or three cues. One therapist walked beside him guiding the walker without supporting him any, while the other held onto the gate belt and just rested her hand on his back in case he started to lose his balance.

We played badmitton with a balloon and two badmitton rackets. He stood holding on to the back of a chair with his right hand and held the racket in his left. We batted the balloon back and forth, he never missed unless I hit it too hard to one side where he couldn't reach.

In occupational therapy he has been reproducing patterns on a large peg board. Yesterday he graduated to the small pegboard. The pegs on the large board have a top that is larger than a quarter, while the small pegs are small than a golf tee.

We sat on the grass outside and played twenty questions. I would tell him I was thinking of something and give him cues on what types of questions to ask to guess what I was thinking of. He did really well. Then it would be his turn and I would ask him questions until I guessed what he was thinking of. His short term memory continues to improve and he has been using his wheelchair to make donuts in the parking lot. It's getting hard to keep up with him.

If you haven't been to see him in awhile, even just the past week or two he has made some great gains, you will be amazed at what you see.